Tonight’s the Night

My  nightly ritual last year was to sit in front of the computer, pour my heart out and cry. Tonight I felt compelled to reread some blog entries and so here I sit, tears streaming down onto the keyboard. But it’s not a nightly ritual anymore. I can’t even remember the last time I’ve cried. What a difference a year makes. Amazing.

Abe turned 11 last week. We were up at his school the weekend before and celebrated. Before we left Abe told me that he was going to try not to cry when we left this time- and he didn’t. And I didn’t (well, not that anyone saw anyway!) You see, Abe’s school isn’t a punishment- it is a gift. They aren’t “training” him to return home one day; they aren’t giving him “therapy” to make him “better.” They are accepting him for who he is and nourishing all those wonderful things about him. They are giving him music lessons -on demand! They are going skiing. They are building snowforts and practicing plays.

Abe was recently home for a three week winter break. I would love to say it was blissful- but what 3 weeks with an 11 year old boy can be described that way? There were definately challenges. But the challenges were sandwiched between such a wonderful time with him. And next time there will be less challenges as we all learn how to cope with our new schedule.

It’s hard to explain, but it feels so normal for him to be away at school. So normal, in fact, when I mention it for the first time to people I often forget it’s not how most families live. I usually catch myself and try to explain it- but I’m still working on that one. The best I’ve got is that Abe loves to keep busy around the clock and needs to be academically challenged in a small setting.

Report cards just came:

“Abe has been displaying a higher level of focus in class during the second trimester. This has been most apparaent during math class. It is exciting to be a part of his increased excitement for this subject. ..He continues to be a very enthusiastic student. He seems to really enjoy school and works very hard in my classes…”

Science A-

Social Studies A-

Math B+

Reading B

Writing B+

I have a new nightly ritual now. I think of A and smile ear to ear, my heart sings. It really does. My mother used to say this too. It must be a mother thing.

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7 Responses to “Tonight’s the Night”

  1. Barbara Says:

    I just found this tonight and browsed back through prior posts to get the back story. All I can say is WOW Mom! Kudos to you! Yes, it’s hard, but somehow you’ve managed to find your way through the imperfect world to the solutions that are best for your son and your family.

  2. Andy Says:

    My heart sings for you!

  3. J Says:

    Lucy, that’s so wonderful to hear. All the best to you and your family. Warmth & hugs, Jackie

  4. Marythemom Says:

    I’m so glad to hear the hope and happiness in your voice. You guys have come soo far, and I’m happy for you.

    Hugs and prayers!

    Mary in TX

  5. HK Says:

    Lucy, I am so happy for you. You’ve successfully reframed your vision, or perhaps just view the present more clearly now, leaving you with a greater sense of peace and acceptance. It sounds like Abe is flourishing in his new school. And all because you hung in there and didn’t give up. Wouldn’t it be a more wonderful world if everyone was accepted and nurtured as Abe is now?

  6. ida Says:

    Dear Lucy – I’m not sure how to reach you. My son is in the hospital at the moment, and I would very much appreciate your contacting me. You’ve gone so much with your son, perhaps you would be able to help me.

  7. Kevin Says:

    see what I mean about us HCSers being very verbal?…sorry!

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